IF I WERE 30 AGAIN
Maybe that sounds a bit bitter. If I were thirty again, I would do a lot of things differently. I am not bitter. I am doing well. And yet it’s true… and perhaps a suggestion for all those who are currently considering which route to take next.
I have made peace with my path. It was and is the way it was and is. I needed the time to arrive here, on Mallorca, with husband and dog and with a lot of freedom of choice.
And yet, in hindsight, I would make different decisions. I would decide more based on my desires and feelings, on fun and adventure, on real interests. I would risk more and strive for less material things. I would not seek fame and glory, but independence and personal fulfilment. And I know today that this is possible.
But if I were thirty today, I would also have so much more information at my disposal. I had to turn fifty to learn about minimalism and find out how less is enough. Through the internet, I found so many life models and strategies that could have encouraged me. But if I were thirty today, I might still not be able to get out of my skin, like back then.
I am formed by my history, by my ancestors, the culture and the time from which I come. For us, achievement was important, money and professional success. I remember my father’s advice the first time I was to be interviewed for a newspaper. He told me, “Don’t say you enjoy what you do. It comes across as unprofessional.” I don’t blame him. He didn’t know any better. Not because he wasn’t intelligent. In fact, he was very intelligent. But because it was what he too had learned. Unlike him, I had the chance to get rid of these old thought patterns, thanks to coaching and Logosynthesis.
And that is why today I advise all my coachees who want to make a life decision: “Only do something you enjoy. Rather make do with less, but live your talents and inclinations now. Live your life now!” Here on Mallorca I meet many Germans who came here twenty or thirty years ago. They didn’t have as comfortable a financial base as we do. But they also found a nice home, a job and set up their lives. Maybe we have more money today than they do. But on the other hand, they have been here much longer and have taken life much more casually – as casually as we are just about to discover.
Nearly thirty years ago, we also wanted to go to a Spanish island, to La Gomera. Back then, we actually had the courage and the spirit of adventure that I so praise in this blog. But then we let a small obstacle stop us. Due to a big change in the exchange rate between the Deutschmark and the Peseta, property prices suddenly went up and we gave up the plan without even having thought about an alternative. We let the first headwind force us to row back. Now, almost thirty years later, I know that it would still have worked out, that we would have found a way. We’ve solved so many problems since then, it was a minor issue at the time.
So to all of you who are thirty (for real or in your heart): Do your thing. Have fun. I don’t mean do nothing or be lazy. I mean follow your passion and make something of it. Time doesn’t come back. So use it here and now.